I Swear This Diner Is Going To Kill Me
I was sitting in a diner in Bumblefuck, AL, waiting for my burger and fries, when the glass door slammed shut with an alarming crash. I looked up - two large, burly men and one woman almost their size closed and locked the door behind them. The sign on the door rattled - “Last Chance Diner. Open All Night.”
“Who are they?” I asked the woman at the next table.
“I have no idea,” she replied apprehensively.
We watched them walk to the front of the diner.
“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. I’m Jed, the leader of this here crew. It’s a pleasure to have you here today. Well, a pleasure for us, anyway.” The three of them chuckled.
“What’s this about, young man?” inquired an elderly gentleman at a table in the back.
“That’s a good question, gramps,” replied the leader, turning to face the customers. “You all are fortunate enough to be here for the initiation of the fourth annual Great Hunt. It’s kind of a tradition around here. See, we take our guns” - he lifted a hunting rifle in one hand - “and our knives” - he raised a knife with a long, serrated blade in the other - “and we hunt our prey until they’re dead.”
“And what exactly is your prey?” asked the woman at the neighboring table.
Jed looked at us with a cold, emotionless expression. “You.”
Was this some kind of joke?
“Now wait just a second!” exclaimed a man sitting three tables down, standing up hurriedly. “You can’t—“
He said nothing else since a bullet exploded through his head, blowing out the back of his skull and shattering the window behind him.
“I think we can,” Jed replied as the man’s body fell to the floor. “Any other objections?”
The crowd went silent except for breathing and hushed whimpers.
“So here’s how it’s gonna go. When I say ‘run’, you’re all gonna head outside and get as far away as you can as fast as you can. If you want to try to hide, feel free, but we know these parts better than you do. We’ll find you. And when we do…”
He made the universally-understood slash across his neck.
“I’d suggest you run. But we’re reasonable people - we’ll give you a five minute head start before we come after you. If you’re in good shape, and smart, you can get pretty far in five minutes. Everyone ready?”
We looked around at each other - no one knew what to do. They were clearly serious, as the dead body showed, and held all the cards. Then our time was up.
“RUN!”
We bolted for the door, almost stampeding each other as we piled out. One man ran directly to his car. He cranked it twice - it wouldn’t start.
“Ah, ah,” Jed said from the doorway. “I wouldn’t try that.”
Heedless of Jed’s words, he turned the key a third time.
BOOM!
The ground shook as the car exploded, shattered bits of metal and flesh scattering across the dirt.
“I warned you,” he said. “Four minutes.”
Without looking back, I turned and ran into the woods, hoping to lose them in the trees.
Minutes passed, and I heard the sound of gunshots. Speeding up, I ran further into the trees. Only a few hours until nightfall. If I could make it until then, I had a chance.
I’d grown up in the woods as a child, and I used all of those skills and instincts to evade my pursuers. Every sound, every scent, every shift in the air directed my path. I felt one with the forest, blending in as it protected me. And every minute that passed, the night drew closer.
But luck eventually runs out. I was perched behind a tree, hoping to remain hidden for the last few treacherous minutes of daylight, when I felt a pressure against my temple. There, in my peripheral vision, was Jed, holding a gun to my head.
“Don’t make any sudden moves; I’d hate to have to splatter your brains all over the ground.”
Raising my hands, I rose from my carpet of leaves and turned to him.
“So you’re really going to kill me?”
“Look at the bright side - you lasted longer than anyone else. As a reward, I’ll make it quick.”
“But I don’t understand,” I pressed. “Why do you want to kill me? I don’t even know you.”
“It’s not personal, darlin’. In this world, there’s predators and there’s prey. You were always prey - you just didn’t know it.”
“Can I at least talk to my family one last time?”
“‘Fraid not, darlin’. Them's the breaks. Maybe eventually we’ll let your family know where to look for your body. But honestly, prob’ly not.”
I marched slowly, his rifle pointed at my back. When I reached the center of a clearing, he told me to stop. I stood, facing him and his two companions, their guns pointed at me.
“I reckon this is as good a place as any,” he said coldly. “Any last words?”
I took a deep breath. “Did you ever notice how amazing the night is?”
He stared at me. “What the heck are you talkin’ about?”
“The night. It’s amazing. The smell of fresh air, the sounds of nature, the feel of the cold on your skin.”
I looked up.
“The brightness of the full moon.”
There was a quiet whoosh - when I looked back down, Jed’s two followers were gone. At least mostly - blood, a severed arm, and a ripped-off lower jaw littered the ground. Their leader stood there, staring at me, petrified.
“What… how did… what ARE you?!?”
I looked at him, fur sprouting and claws emerging as I shifted into my true form.
“You’re so cute,” I said to him, my eyes glowing in the moonlight as my sharp teeth came into view. “All your talk about predators and prey. Did you really think you were the predators?”
